It’s been a difficult week since my last post. I had the worst few days over the weekend than I’ve had in years—lots of physical pain and just in a bad place mentally. I wanted to check in here to let you all know. It’s not an easy journey and thank you for reaching out.
The beginning of the week has been much better. I made it out of the house for a date, a writing group meeting, and dinner out. Tomorrow, I’ll be going to the beach with my brother and his husband. I’m in less physical pain than I have been, thankfully, too. When they both hit at the same time, it’s like there isn’t anything but misery.
Thank you for the support. It means a lot to me and I lose sight of it when I’m in a place where I can’t think of anything but what is bad. I’m hoping this will change. Next week, I will be going into the mental health clinic to go through the hoops to get some beginning treatment. I’m not expecting it make me better. I’m just hoping it gives me a place to start and a place to begin understanding what I’ll have to deal with. Not the easiest, but it is a beginning to something that I’ve needed for a while. Writing about it helps.
I’m focusing on getting better through writing, meditation and learning to let go and accept the situation I am in. I have a plan, albeit a day-by-day situational, but something more than what I had before. Being vulnerable is not an easy task, but I have to be honest with myself, and being held accountable to others about this honesty is perhaps the best way I can deal with this.
Again, thank you.