How To Be Honest

They say that honesty is the best policy. In life, I would have to agree that honesty is the way to go. In fiction, one generally has to lie—or for those that think lying is too strong, “make things up” (it’s all okay!). In an effort to move away from writing-only posts, (though they will still appear) I have decided to write a post that isn’t all about writing!

This idea was meant for my personal blog, but that’s okay. I’m poaching it from myself.

Honesty is about revealing the truth as seen by the individual. I believe that honesty, as much as possible, should be the motivator behind our discourse. Often, it isn’t and that is a shame. I know I am guilty of the Big Lies and the Little Lies. When we tell something other than the truth in our daily lives, for me, it signals my own inability to handle the emotions and reactions of others. I know I can’t change their reaction, though I know I can gauge the reaction before the words come from my mouth—after years of just blurting things out, I’ve finally learned to control the urge to speak, somewhat.

What about omission of the truth? I still do that. I admit it. I do this on occasion to keep family members more or less unaware of the exact nature of the coffee dates I go on. I think this influences how they go, along with other kinds of dates that I have. I always want to tell the truth, but I know that it will hurt someone and I don’t have the heart to do that to anyone (for the most part, I’m a nice guy).

This is a reminder to me to live my life more in the open—to take responsibily for my own actions and words, just as I do as a writer.

Tell me what you think about honesty. Do you think it is a good policy?

P.S. If you haven’t been to my new site, www.kandrewturner.com check it out!

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2 thoughts on “How To Be Honest

  1. Hi Andrew! I love the notion of poaching material from yourself. That is exactly the thing I do. I have been thinking it would be best for me to publish a book titled, Letters to my Girlfriends [how does one italicize book titles on a blog comment form?]. That’s where the real truth lies.

    Honesty. Mostly, I am incapable of rigorous honesty. I can be honest to a fault in most situations with certain people, but, of course, like you, I am guilty of both the Big and the Little Lies. Hell, let’s face it– my life is one lie piled upon the other and what a lovely Tower of Babble it is. On the other hand, I can be honest enough to bring grown men to their knees in tears. Women, too, and that includes me.

    What I can honestly say is that I have relentless defiance, grandiosity and a new and total lack of work ethic. There! I said it. I am hoping that stating the TRUTH and shining a light on them will make these character defects of mine scatter like cockroaches.

    You’re a courageous guy to post your truth to any blog at all– personal or professional– and I admire you for it.

  2. I agree with Marta, this is a very interesting article.

    In my opinion, Honesty does not do wrong, well most of the time. sometimes being honest can have unwanted consequences on other people. Sometimes, it only benefits you. Honesty or truth, I think are not the same thing. You cannot be partially honest, but can be partially truthful. Obviously, ones own version of the story would be true and honest to themselves, but the impact which it lays on the people involved in any scenario could be massive.
    I am usually an honest person, but I do choose not to be honest at various occasions when I fear saying the whole truth might cause chaos in others lives. Sometimes, ignorance is truly bliss.

    In a nutshell “I agree with you.”

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